Captains Explanation and newspapers

I have been standing on the veranda and looking out at the ocean for quite a while today. I had seen the Captain earlier and he had said that he would come and talk to me later in my office if I wanted him to, but that he had to do a few things and would be back later in the afternoon.

I have been thinking about what the Captain had told me yesterday about his wife and child. If they are both gone, why is he here? How did he die? Why isn't he with his family in heaven? So many questions and they are making me have a headache. I hope he will answer them for me and that he won't think that I am being nosey. There has to be a reason why he can't join his family and he is stranded here. Did he want to stay here?  Or is he made to stay here forever? There is more to this than meets the eye.  I will try and be patient and not make him angry . He might not want to tell me all the story. Or maybe he will.

This waiting and thinking is only making my imagination run wild. I should just go in the office and work and wait until he decides to come and talk to me. I don't know how I am going to get anything done until he clears these things up for me.  I am getting chilly , so I am going in now.

Whats this?? An old newspaper on my desk, it is dated 1845. This is really old. I wonder if the Captain put this on my desk for me to read.

The front page has his picture on it and it says that he has come home from abroad and that he is residing in the McCain mansion on the hill overlooking Cutters Cove. There is a whole page spread on the Captain in here. It is so interesting, he has been all around the world and now has returned to stay it says.

Oh! another paper dated 1846. There is nothing on the front page let me look further. Oh! No! the Captain is on the obituary page. It says that he commited suicide by using his gun on himself.  Oh dear!! It says that he became a hermit and would not let anyone in the house and didn't go to town. The only person allowed in the house was his housekeeper that he had since the house was built. She has stated that he became more and more remorseful and at night he would get drunk and dam the heavens for taking his family from him. The housekeeper found him in his den one day, and called the ambulance and doctor but it was too late. The Captain was dead . The house was left to the state as he had no relatives and so it was put up for sale. No one would buy the house because they said it was haunted and that they were afraid to stay there. 

So this is probably why the Captain can't leave this house. He is doomed to stay here because he commited sucide and dammed the heavens. The poor Captain in his grief commited himself to eternity in this house and grounds.  I will ask him just to be sure. I am only guessing by these articles he left for me.

I hope he comes soon. This is driving me crazy. Doesn't he know that a woman can't wait long without losing her mind.  Ahhhhhhhh  Captain. You better get down here fast. I am full of questions and need the answers from you to be sure.

It has been along time and I have been trying to work, but I start daydreaming and lose my thoughts.  Then I feel the breeze from the patio and turn and their he is standing by the doors and looking at me with such a piercing look. I am almost afraid to talk to him.  He walks forward and takes the papers up from the desk and glances at them and then at me.

"Have you read them, lass?", He says. I just nod my head and look at those dark eyes. "Now you know what happened here so many years ago." "I was feeling very lonely and I was very drunk, I  cursed the Gods for taking my family and I got my gun and I put it to my chest and fired it." "I floated out of my body and saw myself lying there and the housekeeper yelling for help and calling the doctor and ambulance." "I couldn't understand why all the commotion because I was standing right there and yet I could see myself lying on the ground.," "Then the doctor and ambulance came and he said I was dead." "Dead. I said to myself, I am here.""Can't you see me I shouted." " I tried to touch the doctor and my hand went right through him. I tried to touch the housekeeper and the same thing happened. I was completely confused and sober now. I have been here for all this time and keeping people out of my home. The housekeeper was the only one I let come in, the bank had hiredher to keep the place clean and I never scared her. In fact, I left the house so that I would not make any noise and she would flee. She is a dear lady and I have known her all her life.  "So. Lass, any questions you want to know?"

I got up and walked to him and touched his sleeve. I could feel him. I could feel the muscles underneath the shirt he was wearing. I could see him and talk to him. I asked him why I could do all these things and others couldn't. He said that he let me see him and that he could feel me too, but he didn't know why himself. It was a mystery to him as well as me.

I wanted to know where he was buried and he said he was buried with his wife and child in the graveyard. The site next to the Cross was his resting place. OF course, in those days if you commited sucide you were not allowed a service, but he didn't care. They just laid him out and then put him in his grave. 

I asked him how he felt about seeing that all happen and he said that he was sad. He never should have done that to himself and now he was  here. He didn't know for how long or what he had to do to go or if he could go even. He spent his days reading and walking and keeping strangers out of his house and grounds.

I wanted to know more, but I decided that was enough for one day. He looked tired and worn and I felt deep sorrow for him. I walked up and looked at him in his sorrowful eyes and rose on my tiptoes and gently kissed his cheek and put my arms around him and told him that everything was going to be alright.

He took me by the shoulders and just looked at me. I felt as if he could see right through me. He didn't say a word, just moved me away and touched his cheek, and slowly disappeared right before my eyes.  I stood there for a long time. Just stood there not moving a muscle.

When I finally came to my senses, I sat down by my desk and started to read all the papers that he had put there for me to read. It told all about the town , his family and others , balls, and his life story . I was so interested that I forgot the time and read  and read late into the night. This was the true story of McCain mansion and the Captain and his family. I read until I laid my head on my desk thinking only to rest for a few minutes and didn't even realize that I had fallen asleep.

"Now look at that lass, she doesn't have the common sense to go to bed when she is tired." The Captain came around the desk and lifted her up and carried her upstairs to the room that she had picked out for her bedroom and gently laid her on her bed and drew the covers over her. "There you go now lass, sleep well." "I'll be seeing you in the morrow." "Sweet dreams lass." he whispered as he closed her door and left the room.